Pleurisy

PLEURISY.


By D. Jonas Laurence



One day we got pleurisy.
We did not know the symptoms of pleurisy.
George said,
"I don't know…I feel like I have eaten a bad curry and I am gonna throw up at any moment."
Peter said,
"I feel as if a zepplin has been rammed into my bowels. I haven't had a shit for days!"
Simon said,
"I feel as if I have been to Africa and have been attacked by those flies that lay eggs in your skin,…until your skin erupts with maggots!"
Jill said,
"I feel as if I have been out for three days in a row drinking cider and taking pills until my eyes are gonna explode!"
Diana said,
"I feel as if I have contracted syphilis and am going mad…more mad each and every day…"
Philip said,
"I feel as if I have been ass-raped by a group of hillbillies, then tarred and feathered, then left for the ants to eat…"
Gemima said,
"I feel as if the crushing cruelty of man has weighted down upon my head like a steel dumb-bell for so long that my spine has become like a twisted spring."
David said,
"That's just life for you."
And then he died of pleurisy.


THE END.